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12.20.24

> Makes Spacehey account

> Remembers that the site is filled with children and obnoxious high schooler edgelords

> Deletes account

12.17.24

The idea of closing your site on certain days is so funny like I thought I was an attention seeker but GODDAMN

12.08.24

Accidentally cut my dog's quick i'm so fucking sad and scared i'm sorry champ i didn't mean it. i tried to stop the bleeding and it did a little but there was a lot of blood i'm really sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel so bad i'm never going to touch the nail clippers again. he can hate me for the rest of my life i deserve it

12.06.24

Me when I am into something: I need to make 1000 graphics about it

12.03.24

Mileven is actual shit, stancy is shit, jancy is on thin fucking ice, uhh what else. oh yeah hellcheer is the literal worst and most vomit-inducing. Lumax is actually fine (I think it's better for Max's development than Lucas's but whatever). Jopper is boring and forgettable, so is Suzie and Dustin. Man if they didn't want people to gay ship the characters then why did they make the straight ships so fucking bad???

12.01.24

god loves YOU. satan loves me. i am his favorite.

11.28.24

God, I hate Thanksgiving. Or maybe that's not accurate to say, more like I hate family gatherings. I hate small talk and fake smiles and posed pictures. I hate pretending to laugh with someone and then immediately going behind their back to talk shit about them. I hate these people. Or maybe I just have a low social battery. I like them individually, but not when we're all together. It's different.

11.26.24

You can really do a lot with 500MB, Jesus. Anyways, a list of some things I like about myself because my therapist told me it would be a good exercise:

  • I take care of my little sister
  • I am good at art and have an artistic eye
  • I find sentimentality in things that some people might not care about
  • I am a good listener
  • I can keep secrets
  • I am funny
  • I am not very loud
  • I am friends with most animals I meet
  • I keep cool collections
  • I know a lot of different media

10.30.24

Excited for Halloween. Also Picmix is so fucking addicting holy shit. I love making silly little collages, maybe I'll put them up here because I'm actually proud of them lol.

10.27.24

It's just you and me, huh?

10.23.24

Decided to put my past dream entries in my dream diary, directly copy and pasted from my personal Discord server without any edits for the authenticity, I guess. When I was taking the meds at first, I was getting a lot of good dreams. I dunno, maybe it was one of the placebo things or whatever, because I was hoping for dreams. Also, I'm into Stranger Things again, but this time, I'm like, really into it now (which means I'm critical of it now). Yay. I'll talk more about it later.

08.24.24

I was a little overdramatic yesterday, sorry. It will happen again. Anyways, I love Dead Boy Detectives.

08.16.24

Sometimes, I feel so happy I'm in love with useless.

08.15.24

Birthday was three days ago (August 12th). Um, I have no strong feelings about it, hence why I didn't write until now. I just hate how I'm 20 now.

08.10.24

One of the biggest complaints about DreadOut is the graphics, but honestly, I love them a lot. It has an old school charm to them, which I think is somehow refreshing compared to how games love being hyperrealistic nowadays. It adds to the unsettling-ness. The enviornment is also phenomenal, I could not stop taking pictures of dark and foggy locations because it just looked so cool and creepy. Like, DreadOut is really janky to play at times, especially during the final act, so I think one of the saving graces really is the graphics. It's beautiful, in a nostalgic way. But I don't know, maybe I'm in the minority.

08.09.24

I fucking hate webps!!!

08.08.24

So "progressive" about gender and sex that you end up being conservative. We're really in it now, Simone de Beauvoir...

08.06.24

I feel like people who boast "fiction doesn't affect reality" despite being face with actual facts and data are too scared to face the consequences of their immoral content consumption. Because when they realize it's wrong, then they feel guilty, or they feel hopeless, because it's all they've known. It's easier to ignore and stay the same than to change, after all. I was once that person.

Holy fuck I just remembered that background-attachment: fixed; is a thing, time to change all my pages with scroll jfc

08.05.24

I keep pushing people away, and I don't know why.

08.04.24

“Often father and daughter look down on mother (woman) together. They exchange meaningful glances when she misses a point. They agree that she is not bright as they are, cannot reason as they do. This collusion does not save the daughter from the mother’s fate.”

― Bonnie Burstow, Radical Feminist Therapy: Working in the Context of Violence

07.31.24

Finally pulled the plug on my Neocities and deleted it. It was a hard decision, but I found that I don't really want my presence there anymore. I don't think anyone will notice, anyway.

07.28.24

Figured out I'm allergic to mosquito spray. This shit sucks ass so bad. I've been sneezing constantly and my eyes burn.

Foods that the ducks will eat:

  • Peas!
  • Normal corn
  • Blueberries
  • Cucumber
  • Tomatoes
  • Dog food!
  • Corn tortillas
  • Bread (Not good for them)
  • Bird seeds!
  • Pistachios
  • Chickpeas
  • Plums

Foods that the ducks will NOT eat:

  • Bell peppers! (They hate them so bad)
  • Carrots
  • Egg shells

Foods that I'm still unsure about:

  • Cracked corn
  • Cherries
  • Oatmeal

07.27.24

After using Nekoweb for some time, I found that I infinitely prefer this site more. It's just more isolated. I've decided to close off my Neocities website for now, I'm not sure if I'm going to delete it or not. I've already downloaded a backup.

07.25.24

I might be crazy or looking too hard, but I feel like ever since I gave the limping duck the niacin, she's been walking better. She still has a pigeon-footed stance, but she doesn't seem to be tripping or sitting down as much anymore. I hope it's actually working.

I also decided to name the flock:
Cream duck (The greediest and loudest one, probably an Orpington duck): Creamy.
Gray duck (The limping duck, probably a Blue Swedish duck): Whisk.
Black duck (The loner and the one most fed up with Creamy's greediness, perhaps also a Blue Swedish duck but black): Charcoal.
Brown duck (No distinct personality, tends to follow Creamy or Whisk, probably a Khaki Campbell): Cocoa.

07.21.24

I don't really understand how you can have a personal website like this and then still use social media such as Twitter or Instagram. I thought we made websites to get away from that. Getting rid of Twitter was the best decision high school me ever made.

Do you think child Senshi never had a problem with monsters under his bed because he would eat them?

07.20.24

I don't just feel estranged online, but in person as well. I feel like there's some sort of secret to social interaction that everyone knows except for me.